"To a worm in horseradish, the whole world is horseradish." Yiddish Proverb
Sunday, May 20, 2012
What's up with THAT?!?! Dear brain of mine...
A friend helped me buy some fish yesterday at my favorite market. He had to leave before we had time to cook it and I was 100% freaked.
As long as I can remember, I have always had issues with approaching, handling, and fixing meat of any kind. I really want to get at the root of why this is, but every time I see dead fish or raw meat, I instantly feel a little like vomiting and running away. I always feel proud and so victorious when I occasionally cut up raw meat for Jack. I feel like it's such a labor of love and the entire time I am reassured by the fact that I won't have to put it in my mouth. And I wash my hands about 4 times afterward.
Being in a place where many people would really love to eat meat if they could afford it, while being able to afford it but rarely want it, has been a slightly weird phenomenon. I feel all kinds of guilt and even make myself try to eat meat (mostly for protein purposes since beans, yogurt, peanut butter, protein drinks and pasta reeeeeally lose their charm after eating them consecutively for long periods).
I do love animals, but I feel like this phobia goes deeper than that. Or maybe it's simpler and I'm over-thinking it, which really might be the case. I was told today by my friend after I begged him to at least clean the fish, that I'm scared of "everything like a baby" (he also knows I'm scared of raw chicken). I naturally got pissed and pointed out that I came to another continent on my own- but in a way I kind of see how he thinks it's childish of me. Ah well.
Anyone have any easy and delicious recipes for fresh tuna? I just can't stop thinking about the eyeballs I will see when I take them out of the fridge. Poor little fishes.
Among other things I don't understand about my brain (and this list most likely has no end):
Why I feel I have to always put on my right shoe/sandal before my left every single time ever since my soccer coach told me EONs ago that it's good luck. I've had some bad days after putting my shoes on in that order.
How it somehow always seems more important to feed my dog than myself.
Why I like UNpacking but despise packing.
How I feel more at home in water than in air.
Why my voice gets 3 octaves higher when I talk to my dog. Even though I know it's crazy of me.
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7 comments:
Oil it and broil it; or cook in a pot. Then use it like canned tuna; on salad or in tuna casserole, or over pasta. Hugs, Momma
Thanks Mom! Maybe I'll have to break in my tiny, ghetto oven tonight, although it's so unbelievably hot here today that I was sweating like mad at 8:30a.m. so I'm not convinced I want to be cooking today. Maybe I'll donate it to my friend who works next door tomorrow if it's still good. I'm such a chicken...
You could always choose to have fresh sashimi ....and use the eyes say as garnish 8-0 Honestly I don't know what to tell you but then again I'm a bonafide omnivore that can't imagine being anything else. On the upside (?) your list of things was a pleasantly reminisent of Rosanne Rosanna Danna 8-0 See as your uncle its both my responsibility and privilege to reassure you by pointing these things out:-)) Love ya!!
btw, 'oil it and broil it' is a recipe? really? maybe it's a haiku? might explain some of your feelings towards fish? Love ya!!
haha! wait, "Rosanne Rosanna Danna"??? This is somehow over my head. Please explain?? Thanks for fulfilling your uncle duties :). Love ya too.
HAHA! To be honest, I was hoping for a little more specific direction too. Good thing I am a total and complete chicken and I gave the little fishes away to my friend who works next door. Next time, maybe next time.xo
But, but... tuna is a BIG fish! Wonder what you actually had?? And I have failed again in the parental guidance department... you DON'T?? remember Roseanne Rosanna Danna... sigh... Check out old Saturday Night Lives. Hugs, Momma
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